The Cow Joke

Not to be confused with the other cow joke on economic systems, which is sooo last Year of the Cow.

This joke's courtesy of Peiying. Reproduced here for the benefit of those too busy to check their mails but have time to visit DuhEconomist.com, which by the way, is a great way to live.

TRADITIONAL CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called 'Cowkimon' and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION

You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch..

A SWISS CORPORATION

You have 5,000 cows and none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them..
You claim full employment and high bovine productivity.
You have the newsman who reported on the numbers arrested.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You worship them.

A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at RM0.06 per litre.
Then midway through, you raised the price to RM0.60 or you cut the supply.
When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and now want RM1.20.
The buyer decided you can keep the milk and they go look for milk that comes from recycled cows or the cow urine instead.
Your two cows retire together with the Prime Minister.

And last but not least,

A SINGAPOREAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
One cow-peh and one cow-bu.

Funny

i was going to blog about an extremely pointless and amusing conversation i had with Neville over sms this morning, only to realise that i'd have to explain so much background, censor off so much information and rephrase so many things that the thing won't be funny but i'd be very exhausted.

so here's something funny from Kennysia.com instead:



it's probably much easier for a guy in any other job to be a blogger.

Resistance II

Shuyin is taking a break from revolutionising the scientific world with her research to come back to SG and amidst my insane schedule and hers, i was blessed enough to meet her up for an hour of 'quick tea', cos she had to go for dinner w her parents and i was going to have mine w Zongbo.

During the two conversations w two friends whom i've not met for quite a while, i realised/remembered one thing. That there was a time when i believed in my job a lot more and was a lot more passionate about it. And the fact remains that very little about it has changed, except for the pple i work for.

In recent weeks, i find myself surrounded by so many MM paper-pushers and salary-collectors that i've become quite very dis-illusioned. but i'm reminded again that i work not for my bosses or for my salary but for the pple whom i take charge of. Just like what Christians believe, leaders come to serve and not to be served.

in this day and age, i think it's not easy to find a man in my job who loves the organisation enough to want to change it.

i think it's even harder to find a man in my job who loves the organisation enough to change it.

but i am me. i choose to be different.

tomorrow, the tyre meets the road.
tomorrow, i go to work.

let's see how things turn out.

"Quote-of-the-Day"!

"Hurting people hurt people get hurt - The Pain Principle."

The above quote is apparently supposed to be very wise and profound becos i saw it as TVMobile's Quote-of-the-Day. And it must be twice as wise as any other quote becos i saw it as Quote-of-the-Day on last Saturday AND Sunday. And it must be even more wise than all the other quotes seen elsewhere cos based on AC Nielsen, TVMobile is supposed to be the 'fastest growing outdoor media', although we're not exactly sure what the other outdoor media are and if they adopt the 'shove-the-media-in-your-face-on-the-bus' way of media-ing.

2009!

i've walked less roads than most and read less books than many...
But this i know:

We're angry when we feel mistreated...

We're disappointed when our expectations are not met...

We're sad when we lost something...

We're unhappy when we're not satisfied...

To those who had a good year, i hope this will be another one for you.
To those who did not, cheer up. There's a brand new one for you to try again. =)

Happy New Year, folks!