How to Lose Weight...

In the post-capitalist world we live in today, an accurate guage of the pulse of society will be to look at the amount of advertising generated by a particular trend.

Now, applying economic analysis (this is DuhEconomist.com ok, Economics is very powerful here...) to this issue: Assuming that The Strait's Times is the only newspaper in the world and the front & back cover of the 'Life!' section are the only important pages, one can almost definitively arrive at the conclusion that losing weight is the issue closest to SGrean hearts.

Now, although DuhEconomist.com is not based in SG, nor is its writer currently in SG, nor has its writer even seen a single page of 'Life!' for the past 50million weeks (s.d. 50million weeks), DuhEconomist.com blog is afterall a blog founded on nationalist principles and as such, shall devote a special issue to the issue (of cos the pun was intended) of weight loss...

DuhEconomist.com teaches you...
DUH way to lose weight

Many people often ask me if eating X is healthier than eating Y... No wait, actually only Alicia asks me that but she does it so often that it is easy to mistake the question to be from many people... Anyway, DuhEconomist.com takes a very simple & elegant approach to weight loss, which we shall now call 'What Lawrence Said' becos it was in actual fact, what Lawrence said...

According to WLS, Weight Loss = You use up more energy than you take in

In spite of the simplicity of this theorem, it is clear that many people do not really believe in its truth, as seen in their attempts to lose weight through a variety of ways which do not incorporate WLS at all... To these people, DuhEconomist.com offers a simple & elegant analogy which may help you understand, which we shall call 'What Yanjie Says'. The difference in tense between WYS and WLS is important. While Lawrence has only been heard to utter that theory once, Yanjie is very fond of giving his analogy again & again and will jump at any opportunity to use it in any conversation, regardless of how inapplicable or irrelevant it is...

Anyway, WYS: "Cow eat grass also can grow fat lor"

This basically means that it's not about what you eat but about how much energy you use relative to what you eat. Hence, even if you eat only grass (or cabbage or brocolli or papier-mache), you will still grow fat if all you do all day is eating grass (or cabbage or brocolli or papier-mache). So the key is: exercise more.

However, we all know how ridiculous/obvious (depending on who you are) such a suggestion is. In any case, as always, DuhEconomist.com is committed to providing helpful & practical advice in matters as serious as this. Hence, DuhEconomist.com teaches you the method to lose weight in a safe, efficient & sustainable way. It takes only minutes and the results are definitely so significant that your friends will have trouble recognising you!

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Get a haircut.

Q: How to lose weight in a safe, efficient, sustainable & cheap way?

A: Cut your hair yourself.

Yanjie is staff writer for DuhEconomist.com, mainly becos he is the only writer. He possesses many amazing skills such as cutting his own hair. Unfortunately, none of them are of any help in preventing pictures he takes of the back of his own head from looking completely ridiculous.